The 10 Commandments for People Receiving Government Assistance
The 10 commandments for people receiving government assistance:
1. Thou shalt not have nice clothing, handbags, shoes, etc. It doesn’t matter if they were gifts, second hand, or bought during better times. You are poor, and should look poor. How else will others identify you?
2. Cell phones, internet, cable TV are all too good for you. It doesn’t matter if you need them to look for work or to get an education or if they are the only entertainment your family has. It also doesn’t matter if cancelling these services would result in major contract termination fees.
3. Thou shalt not have any food that brings a smile to your face or an iota of pleasure to your soul. Being miserable is part of being on food assistance.
4. Thou shalt look appropriately humiliated when using food stamps or WIC vouchers.
5. Thou shalt pull yourself up by your bootstraps. If that doesn’t work, thou shalt pull harder.
6. Thou shalt not be seen in any vehicle nicer than a 1976 Dodge Dart. Ever. Never buy, borrow or accept a ride in anything nicer.
7. Thou shalt sell every possession that is not absolutely necessary to sustain life. If you are not living a life as austere as a Buddhist monk is, you have too much and are sponging off the system.
8. Thou shalt allow thyself to be scrutinized and criticized at all points by any taxpayer who wishes. After all, they are funding your lifestyle.
9. Thou shalt not reproduce. Even if your children came at a time when you didn’t need government assistance, you should have anticipated you would need it in the future and used a condom.
10. Thou shalt remember that no matter what, it is your fault you are poor. You chose this.
